‘We are here to support one another, not “fix” one another’

What it means?

Everyone would love a quick ‘fix’ to their issues. And many come to a 12 step recovery programme expecting just that. But we need to be realistic.

The chances are you have been struggling with your hurt, hang-up or habit for months or years. It may even have become part of who you think you are. Change is unlikely to happen overnight.

As a Christian, I know that my CR journey is not a sprint but a marathon, requiring a lot of effort and perseverance. The athlete is intentional and has their eye fixed on the prize. Our prize is so much more than Olympic Gold – it is to be made fully like Jesus. God has promised to complete the work that He has begun in you – in His way and according to His timetable (not ours). But complete it He will. If you like, ‘fixing’ is God’s work. 

Why is the guideline there?

The recovery process is likely to be hard, sometimes lonely and often painful. We need each other.  A listening ear, a sympathetic smile, a word of encouragement and certainly an atmosphere of acceptance and not judgement. That is how and why we support one another. But we need to remember that, We support, God fixes. We need to keep focussed on our own recovery – just me and God. Of course we encourage each other but to try and fix one another is like taking the place of God in the process. 

Everyone who comes to Celebrate Recovery is entitled to feel safe and relaxed, and able to journey their recovery at their own pace. ‘Fixing’  or offering advice can be full of good intentions but can make a person feel nervous or even threatened. God brings each of us to the willingness for change in His time and when He knows we can handle it, so the guideline ensures that we stay focused on ourselves and not trying to sort out others.

In Celebrate Recovery we say “Don’t quit before the miracle happens”.  Breakthrough will happen if you work the programme and keep trusting God for change, allowing His power to give us the strength we need. It would be a tragedy if you walked away when victory is waiting just around the bend. So, keep looking to Him!